have you forgive?

so, this entry has been on my head for almost 2-3 weeks already. but i have to wait until the very last day of the year, since this will be the closing entry for year 2010.

basically 2010 was a very colorful year for me. and I would personally call it, the Get-To-Know-Myself-Year. I learnt a lot about myself, about limitations, the good and the bad sides of me, how stubborn i could be, and how sensitive i could be, and a lot more things I thought i was, but i wasn't and vice versa.

it was a great year, with a lot of experience, changes and stuff. it was full of love and drama. u realize people care about you so much, and where or what your life should revolves around. and u realize there's a lot of things u've said but you didn't do. and just as i think i have move out my comfort zone, i discovered another comfort zone i was in, and i thought i was very in control of myself and my response towards things, then i realize there are still things i can't control.

it was nice. it was my self-discovery year. and i have no regrets by the end of the year.

i learnt that the only thing that is permanent is family. they are the people who'll never leave you, and you can always go back to them, no matter what.

okay. the point of this entry ; is to forgive yourself. and everyone else around you.

we all make mistakes, a lot. to ourself and other people. we ask for forgiveness from God, and people. sometimes people forgive, sometimes they don't. i watched this video by brother Nouman Ali Khan, regarding the heaven sandwich, one of the criteria of al-muttaqeen, are those who forgive. we forgive, because we want God's forgiveness, for every single wrongdoings we did. the saying goes, "wise people forgives, but never forgets." if you don't really forget, i guess u're not really forgiving. we forgive, we forget, but we learnt something, so we BE CAREFUL next time. 

okay. we forgive, people forgive us (hopefully), and Allah is The One Who Forgives Again and Again. 

but, have we forgive ourself? so often we live in guilt, because we didn't forgive ourself. so i gained few pounds this year, do i have to punish myself by not eating and exercising until i die? nope. i recognize, i should've have lead a better lifestyle, get myself something new that fits, and lead a better lifestyle. (hopefully). 

for every single thing i did this year, ( i don't wanna call it a mistake, cuz that will hurt people) and get me into trouble, i have finally forgive myself and bake a i-forgive-me-cake. thanks betty crocker, u're the best!

forgive yourself. then only you'll start living. don't live in guilt. it's going to take you down. waaaaay down.

okey. yang lebih penting dari entry di atas, adalah, 

i know i hurt a lot of people this year. and i know a lot of u were disappointed with me, i know i did. I AM REALLY SORRY. mohon maaf dengan sepenuh hati, aku tahu ada ramai yang terluka dengan aku tahun ni, or previous years ke, i am really sorry. dari sekecil-kecil perbuatan kepada sebesar-besarnya. and i'll try my best starting next year to respond better to messages, calls and all other types of communication media. and kepada yang ada rasa terabaikan, or terguris by anything i did, i am really sorry, so please forgive me. by the time i wrote this, i have no grudge against anyone, so i was hoping the same way goes to u.

forgive, then only u'll live.

it'll be difficult, but i promise u it'll be worth it.

difficulties.

okey. agak lama ye saye tidak ber-entry soal-soal hati dan perasaan. eh sejak bila pulak kan!

takdelah. rasa kurang ekspresi pulak kat blog sendiri... nak cakap sebenarnya.. pernah tak kau rasa macam life kau miserable, and u're such a mess and all... rasa macam tak best gila.. nak study pun kena bertapa dulu amik mood. cari every single thing that can motivate u to study mcm gambar parents or gambar kasut yang abg you janji nak hadiahkan kalau result ok, (wth????) pernah? tak pernah? okey, kalau pernah, aku rasa it's time that we realize, bukan kita je yg rasa macam tu. there's someone out there yang turut gudah gulana jugak, for whatsoever reason. (aku tgh memotivasikan diri sendiri ni sebenarnya)

setiap orang sebenarnya ada difficulty yg perlu ditempuhi masing-masing. mungkin stress with carry mark ke... bad break up ke... kucing mati ke... duit takde ke... bergaduh dengan kawan ke... berebut harta ke...allergic sejuk ke... nervous nak amik result pmr ke... kombinasi mana-mana dua yang dinyatakan ke... we all have difficulties. and what makes it so burdening adalah the fact that kita rasa kita je yang susah. orang lain happy je tengok. tak. semua orang ada kesusahannya sendiri. mungkin bukan sekarang. mungkin kita tak nampak. we're not alone. we're all in this together (oh, sounds so familiar).

jadi. jalan penyelesaiannya senang saja. try as much as you can untuk tidak menjadi difficulty kepada org lain. dan marilah kita sama-sama mendoakan each other that Allah will grant us strength and patience nak menempuhi semua ni. hopefully kita semua akan berjaya mengatasi apa jugak difficulty tersebut. wahhh.. murni sungguh entry ye semenjak mengikuti drama bersiri "Ayoub" ni.. hihihihi.

ok, stay positive. smile. jangan banyak tidur cam penulis entry ni. tido byk pun letih weh.

akhir kata, apapun yang sedang menghantui minda anda, semoga Allah beri ketenangan yah =) apapun kesusahan yang anda hadapi, semoga Allah berikan kemudahan =

petua berinai part II

okey... i have few posts already in my head, in my head je lah kan... tak tertaip2... internet mcm slow jadi susah la nak update blog. (tipu. tipu. alasan seme tu). sempena pagi ni busy, tak de mase nak taip panjang2 i'm posting tips berinai which i learnt from our neighbor... tips berinai ni waaaaay different than what i'm used to, dan sgt terkedu lah masa dia citer n buat ni kan. tp, mmg berkesan.

it all depends on the type of inai u use. the best would be henna saudi/emirati. so, kirim2 lah kalau ada kawan-kawan yang pergi tu. u can buy locally, kalau in irbid, c-town pun ada. tp becareful sebab byk jugak yg jual inai tipu. the one in c-town works just fine =)

ok, the secret lies within mixing the henna.

bahan-bahan.

karkade - (hibiscus petals tea).

uncang teh

maramia jika ada.

laban (plain yoghurt).

DO NOT USE plain water. bak kata neighbor i tu, haraaaaam may, 3la fadi. (jgn ko letak air, sia-sia je nnt).

so, rebus hibiscus tea tu, dalam segenggam, with air dalam 2-3 cups. sampai kuar warna merah tu. pekat2.. then sejukkan. u can use 2-3 kali hibiscus tea tu kalau nak tambah air. untuk minum, (biasa kita bancuh pink perlahan gila je.) 

1 cup hot water utk 1 bag uncang teh..

1 cup hot water utk beberapa batang daun maramia (hoi, melampau betul teruk penjodoh bilangan kau)

3-4 spoon plain yoghur for acidity -> i have no idea apa kena mengena acid dalam ini cerita.

approx. 250gm henna saudi.

sejukkan air-air ni semua, then  bancuh inai. kalau keras sangat, buat lg air karkade (hibiscus tea) tu dan tambah sampai mencapai konsistensi yang diinginkan. kalau nak letak kat tangan buat keras sikit, kalau nak letak kat rambut, buat cair sikit. jangan cair sangat, meleleh kang susah.

biar semalaman. THE NEXT DAY baru apply ye kawan-kawan.. bawak bersabar, i know u're excited. haha. then bolehlah pakai... utk dark hair, repeat usage dalam 2-3 kali. bancuhan tu boleh simpan dalam peti ais, bukan freezer, bukan luar peti ais okey.

selamat mencuba =)

for irbid people : all ingredients are available in c-town. nak jugak promote ye dak.

ni umur berape ye???

okey. selamat hari jumaat. sayyidul-ayyam. harini, setelah almost 2 years, 2009,2010, setelah berajin dan bermalas, berperang dengan mood tidor dan cuaca sejuk, yang ada fasa aku menang, kebanyakan fasa faktor2 lain + syaitan menang, (pfffffttt.) akhirnya tamat satu kitab feqah sepanjang dah 4 tahun dok irbid, baru khatam sekali. ha..yang bersih je kat kitab sebab memonteng tu, ha..padan muka kau atiqah. sape suruh kan? kan dah tak berkepuasan... so, baru tahu lah ye, (noob nyeeee saye) majlis2 khatam ni adalah antara tempat2 mustajab berdoa... so, rezeki lah, alhamdulillah, harini dapat aku attend hari terakhir baca kitab muqaddimah hadramiah. geng-geng lain jangan risau, maqasid nawawi belum khatam lagi. boleh kejar majlis khatam berikutnye pulak.

baik. itu muqaddimah kita harini. sebagai orang yang jarang bersosial dengan masyarakat setempat, which is why, bila pegi beramah mesra i'll get the "lamenyee tak nampak" comments. yelah, summer i takut hitam kena matahari, and fall-nak-masuk-winter ni i sejuk malas keluar pulak. jadi, i pergi sekolah, balik sekolah, pegi arabella dan keluar makan dgn housemate saje. lagipun sekarang kan tak selamat nak merayap2 sangat. eceh.

mintak maaf la ye hari raya haritu tak pergi beraya sangat, i passed out sebenanye. ampunnn kawan2 sekalian.

but i try to mingle around la especially with new-comers, mmg malu lah kan sebab yang dah setahun dua kat sini pun ada tak kenal lagi, apatah lagi yang baru sampai this academic year... sorry lagi sekali sebab sy mmg suka tanya nama, walaupun dah pernah tanya sebelum ni, mmg i susah nak ingat nama orang. T.T tapi, ada satu perkara yang sangat menakjubkan lately tentang budaya berkenalan ni.

you cannot start a sesi-berkenalan dengan "ni umur berapa ye???". what's the big deal. kalau u tua dari i, i'll panggil u kakak jugak nanti. tp mula-mula i bagi salam, u jawap, then tanyelah nama dulu, duduk mana, belajar mana/apa, tahun berapa, THEN only ask for umur la... no need la awal2 nampak belum tanya nama dah tanya umur. penting sangat ke umur tu... i panggil u dengan nama jugak nanti, bukan "hai, umur-sekian..." so when i ask, "nama siapa ye?" jangan la jawap "ni umur berapa ye?" just because u nak decide nak letak kak ke tak depan tu... kita amik contoh mak-mak kita berkenalan. contohh situasi : kat airport.

"assalamualaikum..."(hulur tangan bersalam)

"waalaikumsalam..."

"hantar anak jugak ye?"

"haah..anak I dah tahun 3, anak u tahun berapa?"

"anak I tahun 2..."

"tiap2 tahun mengulang ke KLiA lah ye...? u dari mana?"

"I dari Ipoh...ni anak yang kecik sekali..eh, maaflah tak berkenalan lagi kita ni, nak panggil ape ye.nama puan siapa ye?"

"Name I tam..."

"oooh...(sambil hulur tangan lagi sekali) salam lagi sekali kita ye. saye bun, kak bun lah kot, dah tua..."

"ha..oklah kak bun, anak i dah nak masuk dah tu, tahun depan ada rezeki kita jumpa lagi ye..."

"ok tam, nnt kalau datang Ipoh, datang lah rumah...boleh sembang2 lagi.."

see? see? macam tu lah i tengok mak-mak berkenalan..baru canggih. baru berbudi bahasa. itupun lambat sikit lah dia tanya nama kan. tp janganle nampak benor nak kan seniority tu kak nab... okey? next time we'll do it all over again, like this.

"assalamualaikum..."

"waalaikumsalam..."

"kita tak pernah jumpa lagi kot ni, nama siape ye?"

"tam..."

"oooo...ok...name saye nurul atiqah dahalan."

then baru la tanye umur i berape ke ape ke..okey? the guys mungkin tak ada masalah ni. agaknye lah. but perempuan mmg ada isu seniority yg menebal ye. takpe, kita kan tatasusila tinggi. wohaaa! tp jgn la smpai berkenalan pakai umur plak kan.

p.s: i have stopped approving people from irbid as well on facebook. sbb yang 50++ mutual friend pun belum tntu i kenal lagi...so, kita kenal-kenal dulu in real life, then u can ask, "ade facebook tak?" okey? baru best.

world toilet day

http://worldtoilet.org/index.asp

Selamat Hari Tandas.

"Kebersihan itu Sebahagian daripada Iman"

let's go scrub some toilet, and don't forget to flush your toilet after using them.

=)

timekasih cik husnameka kerana kerana memaklumkan saye ini.

get well soon

when i go to med school, my definition of fun and interesting is slightly widened. fun things are still fun, but things that are sick, usually bore others might as well be fun to me. i can enjoy my morning cereals watching garlands anatomy video, or flick through pathology lab slides (obviously what will happen if i don't finish studying on-time this year). and sometimes i make comments like, "best gilaaaaa buku ni" on my text book, or additional references. i mean, who on earth make comments like that? buku teks sekolah best? unless some weirdos yang kata buku sejarah spm adalah best. well, sorry ye kwn2 peminat sejarah. haha.

but thank god i didn't lost it, i still find cooking and occasional visit to arabella mall as fun. and of course, visits to hospital is fun too! because u get to see things, and finally something u can relate too. i swear i enjoy every past hospital visits or care-taking session i've ever had in malaysia. (biaselah, tak clinical lagi, jadi excited lebih?) and every sick procedure is new adventure. i might get excited tengok orang buat LP and stuff. to me, THAT is cool. T.T rase macam sicko sangat kan. haha.

and finally, for once, no medically related stuff is amusing to me, since the one who have to go through it, is someone you really care about. nothing is cool or fun about seeing your good friend having to endure such pain, nor having to worry about what comes next. maybe it will be fun when you're the one in the OT performing surgery, but god knows how it feels like, to be sitting in the waiting lounge. not being able to get your eyes off the door, and peaking on every bed that move pass you, to see if it's her. now that is not something pleasant, isn't it? 

to a very great friend of mine, may Allah eases her post-op pain that give me chills.  

bahulu kemboja kuih pemalas ii

ditujukan khas untuk anda yang nak mencuba resepi bahulu kemboja, as tasted kat majlis medisjust07 tadi.

posted before as bahulu kemboja kuih orang malas

Bahan-Bahan

1 cawan tepung

1 cawan air pandan

1 cawan santan

1 cawan susu cair

1 cawan gula

3 biji telur

secubit garam

pewarna hijau (optional)

Mix everything guna blender. minyakkan loyang, tuangkan adunan. taburkan bijan. bakar 180 celcius sampai masak. approximately for 25 minutes satu bancuhan. the thicker, the longer kot. voilla. sedap jika dimakan panas-panas dengan teh o ataupun kopi o. weeeee.

selamat mencuba =)

sometimes, all you have to do is ask =)

mcm tu lah kata Randy Pausch in his book, the Last Lecture.

sometimes, all you have to do is ask. and i'd say never give up on it. just like today, i really need to use the ladies. unfortunately all toilets kat floor tersebut doesn't function. so i went upstairs, and kakak tu tengah bersihkan toilet and block the door with her perkakas. i know she's gonna say NO, IM CLEANING if i want to get in. so, tunggu sekejap, dia tak siap2, i went back downstairs, masuk toilet yg lain. memang konfem, semua tak boleh guna. naik balik. and i ask her anyway, "kak slamat pagi, boleh tak masuk?" and to my surprise, dia okey je bagi aku masuk.

lesson learnt : jgn malu bertanya walaupun selama ni you have been denied the access, mana tau that day is your lucky day, kan? tak mengapa kalau sekali sekala tak dapat apa yang kita nak, asalkan kita tak putus asa ya kawan-kawan sekalian...

exam is very near, dan perlu study sungguh dan tidak bermalas-malas lagi. i have a lot going on right now, so please do pray for me =)

and by the way... my new discovery for today.

 okey, inilah pegaga, aka watercress

and this is water chestnut, aka sengkuang cina

okey, sekarang aku dah teringin makan kuih tako sengkuang pulak. cis. and td dr.ziyad mentioned, seriously i thought watercress is kangkung, sebab he described is as chinese cuisine, dan hidup kat air, dan paya2.. "water chestnut, if you go to safeway, the have it canned" aku pun, "eh, taugey ke??" sib baik cik rokoiah ingatkan i taugey is beansprout. heh heh heh... 

okey, setiap dua orang dari sepuluh yang membaca ni, mesti baru tahu jugak ni. :-p

tahun ni baru nak rasa best sikit ye belajar microbiology, and today after the lecture, someone called, and dr.ziad picked up his cell sambil ckp, "sorry, ana fil muhadara" (translated : sorry, aku tengah ada lecture ni) and i was like, hai, tak abis lagi ke lecture ni, and im quite sure semua org pun terkedu kan. then he smiled and said, "i don't wanna talk to him". hahahahaha. 

cop.cop. speaking of microbiology, dr. mentioned a very interesting tips yesterday. pasal biji labu boleh buat  laxative kasi buang cacing. rebus2 pastu wat minum. labu a.k.a gara'. ye lah, aku dulu masa 1st year jenuh nak fikir ape dia labu bahasa arab, ade jual kat safeway je plak tu. beli separuh labu last month, smpai hari ni tak habis2 lagi. dah 2x aku gulaikan. cik aisyahrkh7 kalau teringin gulai labu, sila maklumkan kat aku ye.

okey. tu je lah for today. aren't u happy im back in the blogosphere, hopefully secara consistent dan less merepek this time around. weeeee~~~

have a nice day semua orang. =)

okey esok cuti, jangan merayap ye kawan2 sekalian. dok umah leklok. semoga semua orang selamat2 saje.

budi bahasa budaya siapa?

Islam itu biar hidup dalam diri, beserta dengan nilai-nilainya sekali.

jangan hanya pada pakaiannya.

jangan hanya pada namanya.

jangan hanya pada ijazahnya.

jangan hanya pada blognya.

macam ni lah senang katanya; beramal dengan nilai-nilai yang baik itu, semuanya adalah nilai-nilai yang dianjurkan Islam. sebab tu kadang-kadang kita dengar, masyarakat di barat, yang bukan Islam, lebih mengamalkan nilai-nilai Islami berbanding muslim yang tercatat pada kad pengenalannya beragama Islam. 

agaknya sebab "budi bahasa budaya kita" nampak too closely-attached kepada budaya dan mungkin jugak bangsa, orang tak berminat nak berbudi bahasa? macamlah agama tak menganjurkan berbudi bahasa ni ye..? baca sirah nabi, biar ambil pengajaran, bagaimana cara berkomunikasi yang dianjurkan. jangan selambeeeee je weh. (ha, sebenanye ni je point aku malam ni)

aku pun bukan baik sangat, sebab tu aku tulis ni, bagi ingat sket kat diri sendiri. jom la kita sama-sama berusaha mengamalkan Islam secara total dan tidak lagi sekerat2. aku lah jugak tu yang sekerat2 tu kan. bila orang kata, yang tak tutup aurat, tak solat lagi baik, lagi ada common sense, lagi bertimbang rasa, lagi berhemat dari yang solat cukup aurat tutup ni, kau jugak yang marah. habis tu, dah yang solat-cukup-aurat-tutup tu yang tak mau beramal dengan nilai-nilai Islam, kita nak marah/salah kan sape??? ha.. jawap cik-cik puan dan tuan-tuan sekalian. yang buka ruang untuk kena hentam tu kita juga, bukannye orang lain..

sekian.

if you want it bad enough

dengan susah i came up with this entry. few days back, my mr.desktop, now it's a she sebab i nearly name her as "cupipi" (as cupipi from dooodolls tu) -comey tak?- was not functioning well. it's all my fault. i even try linux OS on him, dan, i think i'll still need windows.

waheyyyy. mmg susah ye nak bina konsistensi once you skip things. even Dr.J's first crush story didn't manage to get me back to blogging. (sekarang kena tulis Dr.J sebab i notice people arrived here searching for his name). life's good so far, alhamdulillah. =)

If You Want It Bad Enough.

I'm halfway through reading "The Last Lecture" by Randy Pausch. the book is so freaking good, i felt like crying when i first read it. The wordings struck my heart like lightning. and definitely changed my perspective of life and it's components.

so, in one of the chapter, Pausch tells us about how he gets to win Jai's (pronounced as Jay) heart. she's his wife. the chapter was named, "romancing the brick wall". He mentioned (well, the book is based on the lecture he gaved, so he actually said these thigs) "...The brick walls are there to stop people who don't want it badly enough. They're there to stop the other people". And his last lines in the chapter was, "Brick walls are there for a reason. They give us chance to show how badly we want something". 

then after few bouts of thinking, i come to realize that he's right about the brick walls. regardless of what awaits behind them. career, someone you love, success, wealth, ANYTHING. if you want something bad enough you'll make it happen. and after an incident of my encounter with another human being, if you really want something, you'll make time for achieving them. you'll make the time to get through the brick walls. 

so, it hit me hard, of things i said i wanted to have, but i didn't worked as much as i should, i didn't spend time as much as i'm supposed to, to make them come into realization. so i pondered, do i really want this??? it is at  time like this, i realize that one can never make "i don't have enough time" as an excuse. that is way too lame. if you want it bad enough, you'll make time for it. you'll make it happen.

this is the video of the last lecture, i recommend watching them AFTER you finish the book. either way it's good for you anyway. it touched my heart, and perhaps my life. hope it works wonders in yours too.

wajah baru cik cupipi. (cupipi is the cute doll with pink umbrella by the way)

10.10.10 10.10

i'm back.

after few failure attempts, im finally blogging. ade je aral melintang setiap kali nak menulis. so, bersempena dengan angka yang so-called sekali setiap 100 years ni, amik la sedikit momentum to begin blogging.  /wahaha

okie dokie. i guess i'ma have to work harder lah this new semester /sweat .. tak sabar nak start class this wednesday. oh ye, thanks for everybody's concern, but i'm doing great. and i think people are worrying a lil bit too much than they should. thank God people who knows me well didn't. haha

see you guys soon. /bye

onebonez kitchen : resepi jelatah

well. cik rokoiah telah membawa bekalan rendang tok yang massive baru-baru ni. after two days eating the rendang tok with ketupat nasi, yesterday i made nasi minyak, since im inviting one of my taayah juniors to come over to csi. (just find out there are actually two of them). 

nasi minyak was not bad, even though it felt awkward betul buat nasi minyak without "oren squash" (sebenanye nak kate, sunquick) and i don't even have kiub ayam to put in it. first day beraksi kat dapur csi after 3 weeks lah katekan... it was merely nasi minyak with the rempah ratus and tomato puree and salt. sedih tak??? thank god it is still edible. =)

and of course, to complete the kenduri-like dishes there's the jelatah. (picture taken tonite, i added some nasi putih to the nasi minyak. and made some more new jelatah, hehe). ironically, people jarang buat jelatah ni kan. mungkin sebab tak sedar, it's actually very easy to make. i prefer jelatah over acar yang carrot + cucumber + vinegar tu.

Resepi Jelatah as thought by my mother and aunts.

Cucumber peeled and sliced.

Pineapples

onions

tomato ketchup or chilli sauce

salt and sugar to season

kacang tanah : fry without oil, and grind coarsely.

so, potong-potong timun and nenas. i used the canned pineapples. add everythin together, mix it and season it. onions is kinda important cuz it adds flavours to the salad. 

as healthy as jelatah could be, i hate it sebab it is such an appetizing dish. appetizer in western cuisine, on the other hand is something different. the problem with Malay cuisine, appetizer is something that makes you want to eat more and more and more. like ikan masin, urghhhhh!!! when you don't separate appetizer from main course, memang asik nak makan tak berhenti je lah. memerlukan self-determination and will and won't power yang hebat! adoi. u wouldn't wanna know how much i ate that day because of the jelatah.  

selamat mencuba =) kalau tak pernah cuba lagi.

pesanan sebelum berangkat.

aritu mase kat airport. aku tak nanges pun. eceh. first time kot. mungkin sebab dalam kepala dah tak sabar nak balik lagi skali in june nanti. heh heh heh.

and satu lagi sebab kelam kabut jugak nak balik and say goodbye to everyone. mintak maaf sangat pada kawan2 yg tak sempat jumpa, call, reply msgs and everything. duduk rumah time budak2 berdua tu dah balik mmg agak occupied.

mood nak update blog mmg tak muncul lagi. too bad, class start with endocrine system, so i get to extend my hols sampai october 13th. and tonite masih lagi tak siap2 kemas bilik, satu trash bag dah terisi baju dan beg yang dah tak mau dah. haish.

so, antara pesanan penting yang dibawa kali ini.

Abah : "Belajar rajin-rajin, tumpu pada study. jangan sibuk benda-benda lain (selain study).

Mama : "Jangan asyik memasak je. (exact word : Manalah tak gemuk, asyik mengisahkan makanan aje")

Along : "Study atiqah. kurangkan facebook2 tu. (termasuklah blog).


balik kali ni memang menguji kesabaran. bape ramai yang tegur kate aku dah gemuk giler. sob3.. sampai ada spekulasi im soooo happy most probably sebab dah ada buah hati in jordan, hah???wattttaaaaaa...?? tak benar sama sekali ye.

abah muaz : muaz, maksu pegi airport buat ape?
muaz : jumpe abang ak(a)mal.
maksu : hahahahahahahahahhhhh

selamat hari raya

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri

Maaf Zahir Batin

di kesempatan ini , tuan punya blog cik one_munawwarah ingin memohon kemaafan kepada semua kawan-kawan dan sape2 je lah yang membaca blog tak seberapa ni... andai ada terkasar bahasa, tersilap bicara.. terlambat update ke.. ;-)

 so far plannye adelah untuk update bila dah balik irbid nanti.. tengok mood lah ye. masih tunggu kawan-kawan kalau ade yg nak datang beraye ke batu 8 ni ha....kalau tak de i kemas beg je le balik irbid.. sekarang ni siang mmg penat la layan hero dua orang tu... kalau dah tak layan tu karang, ade kepala yg kena baling dengan botol susu pulak, sakit... T_T

selamat kembali ke sekolah untuk cik aisyahrkh7 dan rakan-rakan yea...

update..update..

assalamualaikum..

cik aisyahrkh7 mesti lame je tunggu i update blog.. sorry la weh.. internet rumah pakai dial-up je... (T_T). nak update harini pun bleh tahan seksa jugak...

alhamdulillah.alhamdulillah.alhamdulillah. selamat sampai ke KLIA last saturday night. sadly, sampai je kat arrival, i saw segerombolan the Dahalans. respond was negative. kakak finally waved at me. and within 1meter, i swear la one meter or even less, i heard along convincing my mom "betul ma, ikah tu..." and mama was in denial looking at her new fat daughter, "ish..bukan...bukan...".

i guess i've got really fat lah tu... jom la balik nanti kite kuruskan badan.. wahahahaha...

day one in dengkil. so we went to jualan terus hari raya @ putrajaya. i got myself a handbag, and later at home mom gave another 3 bags she bought in vietnam. so, now im the fat, bag-o-manic , not so little girl. hahahaha.. not to mention the closet raid and more baju shopping, sebab i do need new wardrobe that actually fits me.

then off to triang, which is now in the district of bera. previously it was in temerloh. so, i found this new drinks air kathira / karthira. i think kathira makes more sense, considering it's a mix of a lot of things like air tembikai susu, selasih, air apple/aiskrimsoda, cincau, kembang semangkuk. the vendor claims to have been selling the drinks for 10 years. memang sedap pun. then balik ipoh, we found the air jugak. it was said that air karthira originated in johor. well, i would've include some pictures, but again, you know how suck it is to work with dial-up connection.

balik kampung was heaven on earth la wei... got so many fruits. the boots were actually fully loaded with manggis, dokong, rambutan, mangga . nasib baik durian tak menjadi this year. hehe. the next day, went back to batu 8. sadly there's only two lines of jemaah in the surau during isya and taraweeh prayer. then the next night, off to parit buntar.

parit buntar was hot. hot. hot. but shopping baju was nice la..very cheap cheap one.. and yesterday after some tribulance with the national car, we made it in ipoh. berhenti berbuka in RnR sungai perak. and earlier that day i attended hospital parit buntar CME on Immunization of HPV in cervic CA . every year, 1500 women in malaysia was diagnosed with cervix cancer. damn la, lecture was in malay now i got my spelling mixed up. and surprisingly, the immunization will target form one girls, 13 y/o. the rationale behind this is that the vaccine will only be beneficial for women who had never had any intercourse, "and you know la... nowadays, 13 tahun pun dah..." kata dr. tersebut. so it hit me like, the government are actually aware that kids are actually doing it, and i wonder if they are coming out with a solution to the presenting problem. and maybe we should discuss this in a separated entry.

and 1 in 100,000 injection, subject may develop very severe adverse effect, the guillain barre syndrome. "so, this year, there will be 300, 000 students, so we expect 3 cases of gullain barre syndrome". and the wicked med students i am, i was like, "wei, best gile kot kalau dpt tgk real." hihihi.. astaghfirullah.

today, i finally adapted to the batu 8 weather. alhamdulillah.

the boys were awesome. they both played in that ikan paus pool like crazy. and of course it's the maksu who was tired inflating the pool. adoi

i followed a series on TV3, Janji Kekasih. nice series la, i highly recommend people to watch it. considering the airing time, pagi-pagi buta tu, im sure it's ulangan. the series may have actually been aired before. so,if interested, do check out catch up tv3. but MAKE SURE THINK CRITICALLY. don't simply melatah. cik aisyahrkh7 sila tonton.

till then. bubbye.

a brief goodbye

bismillah...

honestly i can't wait to publish this entry. hihi. this one will be auto-published few minutes after i took off. so, as many of you might have heard, because i've been planting the seeds for quite some time now, i will not be joining you guys to the next academic year.. i will be joining the dof3a 2008 and re-live the 3rd year misery, which, hopefully change into a blossoming spring experience this time around.

i've wanted to tell you guys earlier, but was advised to keep it to myself first. well, honestly, i'm totally cool with the repeating the whole year stuff. by that, i mean, i'm totally fine, not depressed, and you know i will not give up, and absolutely, i'm more than excited to make things better next year. some of you might have heard it from me, or others, because i keep telling people "i don't mind people knowing about this, but please remind them not to make any unpleasant, sad remark about the issue". haha. so, my apologies to those who didn't get to hear it from me earlier. 

your prayers are highly appreciated, but no sympathy please. ;-)

my special thanks to beloved sisters, kak qilah, kak hetty and kak farah for helping me out during the final exams. buatkan nota... jawapkan soalan past years.. tak putus-putus bagi semangat and mengirimkan doa. Allah sajalah balas jasa kakak-kakak semua, dengan kebaikan yang lebih baik dari dunia dan seisinya. 

and also my special thanks to family and friends, for not giving up on me. and i promise to work my lazy-ass off this time. and can pulas my ears if i malas-malas after this. so..for people who had to go the same thing.don't give up, because second chance does not come often. and something better awaits us ahead. for those who still have to go through the unfinished battle, re-match what so ever, go for it, my prayers go with you and whatever the outcome is, it is for our own good.

i've been receiving mixed responses from people around me. surprised was the most popular so far. speechless, happy and so much more. please don't tell me you're sorry for what happened, cuz there's nothing for you to be sorry about. and hopefully my presence will be missed. heheh (poyo.)

and... for no specific reason i come up with this. i just wanted to try both photoscape and paint.net. well.. i guess i'll be graduating in 2014 then. inshaAllah. 

regards, one.

p/s : by the time im posting this, my request to be removed from atyaf_2007 moderator list baru je di approved. sedeyh gilerrrrrrr. (baru ko tau kate nak sedih kan.haha) will be missing this wonderful dof3a.

balik kampung...!!!

ini adelah entry ke-300 yang terhasil setelah onebonez dibuka semula. walaubagaimanapun i think it's the 299th posted.

alhamdulillah. setelah sekian lama menunggu, nervous2 sampaikan tak boleh tidur malam.. hari yang dinantikan pun tiba..keberangkatan pulang ke pangkuan tersayang... mmg i tak tido malam ni sebab dari siang tadi, aktiviti pack sangat. dari meng re-arrange furniture dalam bilik, kemas2... beli barang for bbq... lepastu bbq pulak... then malam sambung pi cari barang yg tak beli lagi and so on.. sambung kemas bilik lagi... and start packing..

memang horror betul packing kali ni... i have one large luggage, one hand luggage also going to be checked baggage, and another hand luggage yg nak bawak naik cabin. MOST PROBABLY mmg kena tumpang checked baggage orang sebab yang besar tu dah 26kg.. the other one around 8 kg.. adoi la... tak pernah lagi so far balik malaysia barang banyak + berat camni.. mungkin sebab this is the 1st time i got my family coklat batu..huhu.. 1kg je pun.. and there's also abah's 2kgs of raisins....

tp paling berat of all is this.

bought this mula-mula sebab.. i was looking for hadiah yang both they boys can use. excitedly, we inflate the pool lah.. then today nak masuk balik dalam kotak tak boleh. i even used the vacuum to suck out all the air... still, outsized the box. aiyaaaa...

with these around,

okey... what happened was... my sister-in-law kirimkan unta yg ada orang main gitar tu utk her nephew, sebab muaz ada, and the nephew tak ada... beli masa mak tok muaz pergi umrah haritu.. so i kirim pada adila yg berpeluang pergi ke tanah suci last spring... and i really like the camel.. and few days ago, jalan-jalan di shari' jamiah ternampak pulak ada camel tu.. so i bought another two for muaz and azam.

so, i end up with this

ha... the whole bag were filled with the boys' stuff. then my housemate offered jasabaik to fill in her extra hand luggage with the toys, and the large luggage can be filled with other stuff, which are mostly cheese utk project2 memasak balik nanti...

the room is now much spacious, cuz last spring break konsepnye adelah susunan yg convenient for leisure reading... ni nanti bukak sem baru kena back to studying-convenient room.. so ubah2 la mana yang patut kan..

okey. suhur terakhir nampaknya di bumi irbid untuk tahun ini. doakan mudah urusan perjalanan harini. my flight from Amman to Muscat (oman) is at 6.30 pm... transit 11 hours then Muscat to KL at 10.30 (oman time)... ETA 9.20 in KLIA...

jom balik kampung...!!!

tahun ni takdelah i kena tengok iklan raya sambil menangis2... hihihi...

nah my favorite iklan of all. (asik iklan syahdu je kan,kasi iklan bunga2 skettt.)




and...selamat travel everyone...!!

cara-cara membuat lemang : step by step.

Sempena nak raya ni... ramai lah sampai kat blog aku ni cari cara-cara membuat lemang... so, i kemaskini-ed the old entry so it is more accessible to the reader.

Cara-cara membuat lemang : Step by step guide.

The Buluh

Pertama sekali, buluh yang telah dikerat2 itu, hendaklah dibersihkan. refer gambar. pembersih buluh ni dibuat dengan sabut kelapa yang diselit pada pelepah salak. pelepah ape pun boleh as long as keras and cukup panjangnya. buat macam basuh botol susu anak, lepas tu ketuk2 guna pelepah tu pada badan buluh dan saksikan, miang buluh yang kelihatan seperti habuk2 putih akan keluar bertebaran. buat banyak2 kali sampai takde dah keluar abuk putih.

Keduanya, dibasuhlah buluh tersebut dengan air, lalu kita toskan.

setelah itu, daun pisang adventure pun bermula. sebaik2nya,gunakan daun pisang hutan. tapi, it's very fragile so, kalau tak pandai, berlatih dulu pakai daun pisang lain... sayang je rosak daun pisang hutan tu. org kata lagi sedap ke ape tah. i ruined quite a lot daun pisang that abah had to take daun pisang belakang rumah which is even more fragile. solution : layur dulu daun pisang tu. mula-mula ukur panjang daun pisang dan lebarnya. lebar tu, agak2 muat membalut buluh tu kira dah cantik lah. jangan lebih sangat lebarnya, kalau daun berlapis gulung, susah u nak masuk beras.

.

teknik memasukkan daun pisang ni adalah the most crucial step yang akan mengorbankan daun2 pisang anda. amik bahagian batang ataupun pelepah kata orang, of the daun pisang, belah tengahnya. lepas tu, sepitkan daun pisang yang dah dipotong tu, make sure u sampai ke hujung, kalau tidak alamatnya, koyak le masa u nak gulung tu. then gulung perlahan-lahan. masukkan pelepah yang dah digulung tu ke dalam buluh, pusing2 untuk bagi daun tu fit in the buluh. then tarik pelepah keluar. tadaaaa~~~ siap lah buluh2 berdaunkan pisang,

then, pergi siapkan tempat bakar lemang.

rendam beras pulut selama 30-60 minit, tos.

bancuh santan dengan garam secukup rasa. (2kg pulut 4 kg santan  apehal plak lebih santan dari pulut. pembetulan : 4 biji santan- wohaaaa gila tak sihat) dan gaulkan dengan pulut. of course you will have santan yang menenggelami pulut. asing jugak sedikit santan, jangan dicampur dengan pulut dulu. by the way, it's ok to mix your santan with air.

lepas tu boleh la kita memasukkan beras ke dalam buluh.. yeay yeay!!! oh ye... kalau nak lemang jagung, tambah je jagung skali.

masuk sikit demi sedikit, dan hentak buluh perlahan-lahan. sambil hentak tu, make sure u pegang daun pisang tu, sebab kalau tak, boleh jadi daun pisang u masuk ke dalam buluh.

masukkan beras yang bercampur santan, sehingga jarak dari pulut dengan santan dalam 3-4 jari dan pastikan ada ruang dalam 3 jari lagi dengan mulut buluh.

lemang is ready untuk dibakar.

bakar berjam-jam lamanya, sampai masak, dan berminyak sket. tambah santan dalam buluh bila perlu. requires experience and practice.

then ask your mom to cook rendang / goreng ikan masin (for lemang jagung).

masa membakar tu, hentak2 jugak ya.. pelan2, karang terpancut keluar pulut + santan panas tu.. so my abah said, i cant do the hentak-menghentak sebab takut melecur kena pulut panas.

selamat mencuba. sila hubungi encik dahalan untuk maklumat lanjut.

kenalkan, buluh2 dari pahang... nk wat lemang, ko kena tengok jugak ketebalan buluh dia. yg ni, sedang elok je.. kalau tebal sngt raya pun tak siap masak lg lemang ko.

pembersih buluh

.

buluh2 selepas di basuh...buat gaya kudus

encik abah dengan pasukan daun pisang simpanan persekutuan.

daun-daun yang terkorban. abah : "kalau meniaga lemang dengan kamu, habis sepokok pisang"

daun pisang yang dah dipotong, disepit ke pelepah pisang untuk digulung.

encik abah menunjuk skil masuk daun pisang, woopsie terkoyak pula nampaknye

kayu-kayu pokok rambutan yang dah disimpan selama 9 bulan.

buluh-buluh yang dah bersedia

abah memberi taklimat pengisian pulut

sy tiada lebihan daun di kepala bukan sebab tuan blog ni salah ukur daun

buluh-buluh yang dibakar... ini baru panas dunia beb

sekian dahulu karangan saya kali ini. selamat mencuba, selamat hari raya maaf zahir batin.

and yep this year we're making lemang again insyaAllah, and i'm planning to make a video of it. so people can get better explanation how to make lemang by abah himself. selamat mencuba ;-)

final exam : day three

ok. final exam day three marks the end of this academic year of mine 2009/2010. exam farm animal, last elective subject. so far.. carry mark farm le paling tak canggih sekali of all elective courses i've taken.3 out of 4 are in faculty of agriculture, spent 2 summers la amik agriculture dalam bahasa yg lebih poyo nye kan.

so. agenda kita harini jawap exam kul 8.15. pastu balik ke irbid, kalau dah bukak kedai minyak atar beli minyak atar abah. re-arrange bilik dan kemas beg. lepas tu update status facebook pada hari esoknya,
"esok balikkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk".

inilah kali pertama yang hari-hari aku pegi check markah dah keluar ke belum kat khidmat tolib. kalau tak... mati hidup balik pun ak tak mau check result exam. heh heh heh.

hai hai hai. hai hai

tajuk je dah tahu dah tengah happy..

zaman skarang ni, pagi-pagi je boleh update blog dan blogwalking. lain-lain waktu mmg asik takleh akses je.. tapi takpe... berpagi-pagi itu kan ada keberkatannya. harini udara segar, nyaman. seriously asik terbayang rumah merah bilik C. why, of all RHBA, RMBC, RPBD, RBBB, RMBA dan RPBD lagi sekali, RMBC pulak yang ak ingat. mungkin sebab bulan puasa? haha. 

segar bugar pagi ni.. nak mengemas2 untuk balik.. bukan ape nok, serius rase macam zaman sekolah menengah dulu tau. kemas2 barang pagi yang kita nak balik rumah tu kan. eleh. macam lah balik harini 12.30 tgh hari pun. hihi.

dah terkenang hari mendaftar setiap tahun akademik yang baru pulak. adoi. persoalannya, kenapakah budak sekolah i dulu suka baca novel bila dah habis exam akhir tahun???bosan.

final exam : day two

paling mencabar skali.

malam semalam dah tak berapa cukup tidur. balik exam baru lelap. then malam tadi pun even worse, ha.. nampak sangat the exam is really stressing me out, sampai tak bleh lena tidur. sleepy yet cannot fall asleep. neck stiffness dan berat kepala. tolonglah jangan sampai get cranky today. aiyoh.

mungkin sebab there's only 20 questions for 40 marks. 

(#_#)

final exam day one

after one sleepless night. cewah. maunye. adelah sejam je yg betul2 lena due to severe heat + blackout. and alhamdulillah we can access blogger.com balik. traffic pun all the sudden je jadi semua visitors from Malaysia saje. chronic tak? i think last few months ada jugak jadi mcm ni... but this time for two days, habis hilang mood nak blog benda-benda bermanfaat. (tipuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu).

okey. harini exam food preservation ye. oops before that, my exam schedule, as usual

21st - Food Preservation

22nd - Clinical Psychology

25th - Farm Animal

then 

27th - balik!!!

28th - arrival in KL.. ETA 9.30pm

29th - balik pahang amik buah abah kata

so...jom saling mendoakan kejayaan satu sama lain. eceh. 

semalam masa black out, ya, i still don't get myself kipas smarties tu sebab by the time duit JPA masuk, all smarties yg ada kipas kat c-town telah sold out, and they don't even bother to re-stock. so, i was  so panas, and have to kipas myself to sleep pakai kertas, which is, obviously doesn't work sebab nnt mestilah lenguh macam mana nak lena kan. then ak teringat kalau kecik-kecik dulu bila blackout mesti mama kipaskan sampai anaknya tertidur... kadang mama terlelap i'd wake her "ma...panas" or when she kipas herself i'd go "ma...tak kena angin..." haiz. bila dikenang2..apa punya anak la atiqah ni... anak bongsu!!! kahkahkah... 

terus i amik phone, 

"Time kasih mama sbb mase ikah kecik dulu tolong kipaskan smpai tido lena bila blackout.saje tringat sambil2 kipas diri sendiri".

mama tak reply pun. jangan-jangan airmata beliau bergenang dah baca msg tu, sbb airmata i pun bergenang sambil taip msg tu mlm td.

nnt bila dah grad, insyaAllah ikah kipaskan mama pakai transcript graduation. wohaaaaaa

it just never stop

so one day you buy a pretty marine blue blouse.

then you need a white skirt and a white scarf to suit it.

so you get the white scarf, and haunt for the white skirt.

after 6 months or so you get the white skirt, but u outsized the blouse.

then you need new blouse to wear with the skirt.

then few months later you found new blouse that suits the white skirt (the colour).

but then you feels like the white skirt too flowy and messy for the blouse.

then you have to get a new skirt for the blouse.

so you go skirt haunting again, and found a decent one.

and the skirt's so pretty you can't help but to look for more blouse to wear it with.

(thank god you didn't buy any)

then you come home and put the pieces together.

and you realize you already have a skirt that suits the blouse even better.

which you haven't wear because you don't have a blouse that matches it.

now you need a scarf that suits the blouse and skirt.
and a another blouse to wear with the new skirt. (hah???)

and they just go on and on and on and on.

then you write this in your blog and be reminded you have another shirt you can wear with both skirts.

yippeeee.
now you see why i hate shopping/wearing two pieces. 

chocolate chip cookies recipe

assalamualaikum.

ramadan kareem. =) it's been a habit, for me to have one type of kuih raya to eat during ramadan. usually, it's the tat gulung nenas. but, i can't find my tools and lost the recipe... (the one that taste like mama's tat gulung). so, this year, i tried chocolate chip cookies. and searched for the famous amos recipe, (i don't think it's the real recipe, but the effort and the outcome is kinda satisfying). made this one week before ramadan, and by 1st ramadan there's like 1/4th of the jar left. hee hee.. and when i made this, all supermarket are out of chocolate chip cookies, so this chocolate chip cookies doesn't have chocolate chip in it, and still taste awesome.

2 cups butter
4 cups flour
2 tsp. baking soda
2 cups granulated sugar (u should use less, because it'll be very sweet)
2 cups brown sugar
5 cups blended oatmeal (measure n blend in blender to a fine powder)
24 oz. chocolate chips (680gm)
1 tsp. salt
18 oz. cadbury bar (grated. YES you HAVE to grate them) (510gm)
4 eggs
2 tsp. baking powder
2 tsp. vanilla
3 cups chopped nuts (of your choice)

cream the butter with both sugars. add eggs and vanilla. mix together with flour, oatmeal, salt, baking powder and soda. add chocolate chips, cadbury bar and nuts. roll into balls and place two inches apart on a cookie sheet. bake for 10-15 minutes at 190 celcius. makes 122 cookies.

p/s: i halved the ingredients, without chocolate chip, ends up with 70++ cookies.

do you take ramadhan for granted?

i think this video says it best, don't take this ramadhan for granted. how many people are laying in their grave who thought they could make it to this year's ramadhan, to clear everything up. they never made it.

ok. itu point satu. point yang kedua adalah berkenaan (eceh). jom jadikan ramadhan sebagai retreat camp ataupun bootcamp (atau apa juga nama yang anda inginkan) untuk menghadapi the coming 11 months. inilah masanya to sharpen our saw (rujuk 7 habit). jom kita ambil peluang tingkatkan dan mantapkan lagi relationship status dengan Allah. and always remember, ramadhan bukan tempat membodek, it's for training purpose. ;-)

okey. seterusnya adelah gambar seorang kanak-kanak yang mencintai alam sekitar.

terduduk sebab syahdu sangat tgk rumput

lagi aksi cintakan rumput

okey. yang comel dalam gamba ni adelah abah. bukan senang tu abah i nak senyum2 tangkap gambar. mama kata polis mmg camtu. haha.

ayam

Me
ok lah, nak pergi buat2 study.
esok exam food. td exam farm animal.
tahukah anda ayam betina boleh bertelur tanpa ayam jantan..?
jangan2 abah pun tak tahu ni

Mohamed Akmal
mestilah tahu. abah kecik-kecik kan main, makan, tidur semua dengan ayam.

Mohamed Akmal is now offline.

tadi masa tengah baca chapter poultry, aku terbau-bau je bau telur ayam panas. maksudnya mummy chicken pergi bersiar-siar lepas mengeram. tau tak bau dia macam mana?

"abah, abah... abah tahu tak ayam betina boleh bertelur walaupun takde ayam jantan?"
"tahu."
"ikah baru tau abah. ternganga-nganga dalam kelas tu."
"kamu tau, ayam jantan pun boleh bertelur, tapi kecik je telur die"
"tipu. tipu. ayam jantan maneeeee boleh bertelur."
"cuba kamu tanya dokter kamu esok".
"tamo.tamo. ayam betina je boleh bertelur".

kesian kan. dari kecik sampai tua asik kena doktrin fakta auta semua ni.

penambahan/pembetulan: cik sopiah kate ayam jantan memang bertelur, kalau kite basuh ayam telur tu ade dalam perut ayam. cik sopiah kate nenek die yang cakap.

satu hari di kelas food

"name a bacteria that is resistant to antibiotics"
*suara2 perlahan - tuberculosis...dan berbagai2 penyakit manusia*
"H1N1".wow.
"sho gulte?shooo???"
"H1N1"
"ente sho btedrus??"
"tibb basyari"
"allah a3eenak. ma bte3raf isim am virus aw bacteria????"

terjemahan


"namekan bacteria yang resistant kepada antibiotics" (namakan bacteria yang kena guna 2-3 antibiotics baru boleh jalan).
"H1N1"
"ape ko cakap? ape??"
"H1N1"
"ko ni blajar ape?"
"perubatan"
"god help you la wey. name virus dengan bacteria pun ko tak tau?"

moral : teruskan menjawap. salah pun takpe. koman-koman masuk blog aku je pun. haha.

the weather finally did it to me

bismillah...

it is today, i think i realize the weather has taken its toll on me. i think i'm a lot more a harsh person then i used to be. weather ke ha? benci kan.

tapi kadang-kadang it's just me being reactive to circumstances. takdelah salah cuaca pun. :-P

tapi summer kali ni memang panas mengaum ye. tapi. tapi. tapi.

saljilah tahun depan, aminnnnnnnnnn.

that is so.........................

so, sometimes i do stupid things. okay, maybe most of the time. and i wonder how many times people are actually annoyed by things i do/did/done. because, i am easily annoyed by things people do. contohnya macam cara menaip yang so-called ranggi, hip, hype, make-me-hypertensive pun ade. contohnye. oih tak boleh la bagi contoh. nanti backfire kot.

lagi, bila tengok orang dress-up macam ........................ erm, pelik-pelik sikit. okey, itu tidaklah annoying, cuma level make me scratch my head saje. bayanglah, aku pergi sekolah pakai baju warna kelabu dan tudung abstrak (bak kata orang rumah) aku. jadi most of the time aku memang rasa aneh tengok orang dressing canggih-canggih ni. this time, it's my bad lah, bukan orang tu. lagi satu aku pelik bila melayu nak dress-up macam arab sangat, sebab pakcik teksi selalu puji orang melayu kat jordan, sebab pakai elok, tapi orang melayu nak jugak pakai macam arab. jadi, aku sekali lagi pelik. ceh, padehal aku pun kadang-kadang sama naik je, wannabe sangat.

orang comel pose macam mana pun boleh. set-set kita ni, tangkap gambar "bajet-cute" satu, print dan pos pada mak, lalu mak pun kata, "ape kenanye ghope(rupa,macam) ini gambo budak ni???"'. urgh. tak payah ulas lanjut lah. 

kesimpulannya. (sebenarnya aku nak taip pendek je tadi, well it happens all the time, i always drag my entry). ramai-ramai dan macam-macam yang retarded di mata aku, adalah sangat normal di mata orang lain. dan normal di mata aku, mungkin retarded di mata orang lain. so, it's okay, we can both start calling names. or not calling names. haha. dan bila search image for retarded or retardation, mesti keluar gamba syndrome down, man, i find it offensive lah. sebab aku rasa kadang-kadang normal people are even waaaaaay retarded dari people with mental retardation. tapi, pada scale aku lah kan, scale aku.

berbalik pada ayat pembuka kita tadi. sometimes (i do mean most of the time) i do stupid things. and usually aware of how stupid it is. or maybe lama-lama baru sedar it's stupid. kadang-kadang we do things as a mechanism of defense, unconsciously, we just dont want to hurt ourself. i wonder if that, again, is considered as stupid jugak. living in denial, while u already knew it. and it's a pity kan, most of the time, we just lose our judgement. 

devoid of professional conduct?

grabbed from group df3at 2007 on facebook

out of hundreds of lectures we attend each year, for three semesters, there are lectures that rock you to sleep after 5 minutes (or even less). the ones that you can't-stop-looking-at-your-watch-every-30-secs. the ones that you spent reading something else, or daydreaming on what's for dinner tonight and so on. well, i know I DO have those lectures.

and of course there will also be lectures that really get into us. the ones that make us stop, and ponder upon things. the ones that pass by without us knowing that it's been 45 minutes of attentive listening. the ones that inspire us to shape our future planning. one of mine was today. (besides another lecture last year that got me into tears simply for the phrase "treat your patient like your family". at this point, i realize im very sensitive about the patient. haih)

"...out of 300 students, only 60 of you were here (well, im sure it's even less than that). that is why, we have many students who achieved very high grades in the USMLE, step-1, step-2 but those students failed in communication skills. those who didn't come to the lecture, are devoid of professional conduct.." or so, said my clinical psychology professor. i finished my coffee and move to front row. man, this is going to be a great lecture.

we talked (well, HE talked) about 20 rules of physician-patient relationship. well, i guess it's undeniable that patient is the essential of medicine. there's no need for physician, unless there is a patient. and upon completing quarter of the rules i was already like "crap, rules are really meant to be broken, because i dont think i've ever met a physician who abide this rule 100%". yet, i think i  should post this somewhere i can see and meng-sebati-kannya in my life. 

you can most probably google the rules or refer KAPLAN textbook. but what hit me the most is how attending lectures is important in your life in medical school. it MOULDS you into the kind of physician you want to be. you don't attend the lectures simply to gain knowledge - which you can get some of them from the book or recorded-and-then-written-lectures (which gives you 95% accuracy of the actual lecture, or perhaps even much better organized). but the most important of all, is that you spend an hour with a physician who posses a great range of knowledge and experience. those are the thing that enriches your life as a med students. 

well, at least now i know why some lectures appears super boring to me (basically because the professor only talks about the material, and just that). but there are also professors who give a dash of his inspirations, hopes and expectations towards us, which are most of the time, NOT INSERTED in the written lectures. because they never come up as a question in the exam, but they are super duper important in our life later on. medicine doesn't make you any better than other people just because of the knowledge. it makes you a better person, because you understand human a lot more, you learn the needs  of another human being.

well, i'm sorry for people who're not happy being in JUST medical school, because i know i'm enjoying every second of it. admiring my professors, though there are more of them, whom i've not met and given chance to adore. but again it's up to you, wether to keep whining for the whole 6 precious years, or make the best out of it. 

i nearly changed my interest to psychiatry this morning for the sake of "i am sooooo going to tell other med students these stuffs". then i was like, if it's psychology or ethics, perhaps i'll end up just like my professors. students just wont come (i mean those who're supposed to be lectured on this). well, i guess i'll just pursue my american-dream. eh tak tak. i'll pursue my dream then teach. because as for now, im just a medical student who writes in her blog while people read and question my performance in med school. but that day will come, when im all superior to those med students, make their life hell, and give them worth-remembering taste of their own medicine. baru 3rd year dah pandai kan!

p/s: was it DEVOID PROFESSIONAL CONDUCT or DEVOID OF PROFESSIONAL CONDUCT?