journey to the P : part one

bulatnyeee muka kau senah...haha

bagi most people, obtaining a driving license is never a big deal. but for me, yang penakut ni, it IS a big deal. on wednesday attended an hour lesson, belajar naik bukit, dan parking... i was expecting MAYBE kena bawak di jalanraya, thank God tak kena.

for today's lesson, I thought nak pegi litar lagi, belajar parking ke kan. tiba-tiba pakcik tu turun kereta, so I was like, eh, pakcik ni nak jumpe abah ke ape kan. early this morning, masa pergi ke imigresen, I've already told abah,

"abah, in case harini kena bawak kereta kat jalan raya abah ikut belakang tau"

"kenape pulak?"

"ye lah...kalau abah mesti la abah tak langgar ikah, orang lain belum tentu...."

dekat-dekat 3pm, pergi lagi jumpa abah. 

"abah, ikah nak pegi belajar memandu ni kejap lagi... abah taknak ikut belakang ke?"

"tak payah.. ape pulak nak ikut belakang?"

"tak payah eh..? tapi dulu kecik-kecik kalau first day naik bas sekolah mesti abah ikut belakang bas kan."

-YES HE DID. takut anak bongsu dia salah turun bas. haha.

"itu kecik-kecik...ni dah tua dah, bismillahitawakkaltu 'alallah aje lah...."

zzupppp.Berlalu pergi menunggu pakcik sampai.

Mula-mula bawak memang la cuak kan... bawak dari rumah ke kem PPH... pusing... pastu entah kemana-mana ke The Haven lah...McDonald tambun... Tmn Perpaduan... Tau-tau je dah sampai Bercham dah anak cik lan ni... pastu pusing Tg. Rambutan... It was scary. But then, I realize I actually can do it. No one is going to hit you as long as you be careful. Ada jugak kereta hon tadi, abah kata mana boleh hon dekat orang belajar memandu... ish ish ish... dan motor yang langgar traffic light and I nearly ran into him too. Karang kalau dah mati orang tu, tak pasal-pasal aku pulak nak kena puasa 2 bulan kan, membunuh tanpa sengaja.. Nauzubillah...

Anyway, my parents were surprised too that I drove that far. And I think I've made a good progress in getting out of my comfort zone. Alhamdulillah.. Yeay Me!!! So, I rewarded myself with unhealthy nearly 1500calories food only to feel guilty on the finishing bites. I was going to say, "you deserve this atiqah, you've made it!!!" suddenly my inner thoughts was like, "No you don't, you deserve a run..." sob sob sob... nampaknye gagal melaksanakan justice kepada diri sendiri.. 

All my knees, ankles, neck and arms hurt so bad. abah kata because i was too stressed, tak pandai nak relax lagi bawak kereta. Tak dibenarkan complain sebab abah had to drive a land-rover, 8 hours a day daily masa nak ambil lesen dulu.. Even running doesn't hurt like this tau.

SO I DID IT :-) thank you everyone for you support, encouragement and tips. 

p/s : letaklah banyak mana sunblock sekalipun, the heat burns.

Lesen L

[Iklan] BlackBerry PlayBook 

okay...anytime from now i'll be getting my learner's driving license... lepas tu kita kena habiskan 10 jam belajar, (which abah think is not enough) dan kalau L kite dah matang sebulan kita pun boleh lah test JPJ... what happened was... oh cop2... nak story dulu how to get to the lesen L..

1. ujian buta warna bertulis
2. ceramah KPP - 5 jam
3. ujian undang-undang - ujian penglihatan mesti betul semua, otherwise u will be barred from EVER having a driving license.. bahagian undand-undang kena betul 42/50 to pass... kalau tak kena amik ulangan.
4. attend ceramah 6 jam.. 3 jam kuliah pasal kereta, another 3 jam di litar... tengok enjin, maintenance kereta, and then start driving di litar.

so what happened was.. masa tengok enjin bla bla bla tu memang best... then pakcik tu pun bawak la i naik kereta kancil tu.... and i'm the one who had to actually DRIVE the car. takutnye tuhan saje yang tahu... bawak dalam litar bukan exceed 30km/j pun... habis-habis pun gear 2 je kan.. minyak pun bukan tekan sangat..

ok...masalahnye skarang, i got so scared bila nampak kereta lain. not to mention i keep forgetting to check the side mirrors and rear-view mirror. tahu-tahu ade je kereta kat tepi. sometime i would even STOP the car semata-mata sebab ternampak ada kereta lain dari arah bertentangan. ataupun refuse to drive sebab ade kereta kat belakang??? tapi pakcik tu suruh jugak habiskan bawak. masa tu i know i have to tell abah, i think this is the furthest i can do. lesen L. haha.

balik rumah je terus demam diiringi tonsilitis. i memang kalau stress cepat tonsilitis.immune suppresses kaedahnye.. i told abah i don't think i can continue. mama was like, "bukan semua orang boleh memandu... bukan mama nak discourage kamu, tapi kalau takut-takut ni, nanti lagi masalah...tak apa, nanti kalau panjang umur mama dan abah boleh hantar dan ambil dari hospital..." cewah. i was like, yes, mama is on my side. then other people would tell me memang macam tu mula-mula ni... along was like, "takkan la kamu taknak drive sampai bila-bila..??" 

and then recently, after i decided to at least take a time-off from driving, (aku rase pakdin tu pun merasai aku ni spesies tak bleh memandu....die pun senyap je takde mention pasal lesen L aku...) abah said, "memalukan lah, along...angah..kakak..semua ok je memandu...ikah sorang aje penakut...sampai demam-demam..." well, that trick used to work very well in motivating me, but not this time.

"ini semua salah abah. dari ikah kecik, abah asik kata jalan raya tu bahaya... bawak motor tak boleh..bahaya.. bawak basikal tak boleh...bahaya... ikah nak main rollerblade pun abah tak bagi... lintas jalan pun pegang tangan orang...macam mana ikah tak jadi takut nak bawak kereta...."

hihi. and few hours later, i told abah that again, and that i was afraid other people would hit my car.

me : macam mana kalau ada kereta langgar ikah?

abah : orang bawak kereta...bukan nak langgar orang...

me : kalau ade pemandu cuai camne...

abah: same lah macam jumpa doktor.... kalau semua orang takut dapat doktor yg cuai, tak pergi jumpa doktor ke??

ok terdiam. then along proved me wrong lagi sebab i don't get too scared bila naik kereta dengan orang lain. cuma gayat2 je.. so, it's MY issue. i don't have confidence in MYSELF.

misi getting out of comfort zone kali ini  : to overcome my fear of driving. wish me luck, and please pray for me. tips are most welcomed. thank you.

 click Here for Blackberry PlayBook by Maxis